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Beat. A bird of my tongue is better than a beast of yours. `
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Bene. I would my horse had the speed of your tongue, and so `
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good a `
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continuer. But keep your way, a God's name! I have done. `
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Beat. You always end with a jade's trick. I know you of old. `
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Pedro. That is the sum of all, Leonato. Signior Claudio and `
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Signior `
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Benedick, my dear friend Leonato hath invited you all. I tell `
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him `
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we shall stay here at the least a month, and he heartly prays `
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`
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some occasion may detain us longer. I dare swear he is no `
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hypocrite, but prays from his heart. `
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Leon. If you swear, my lord, you shall not be forsworn. [To Don `
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John] Let me bid you welcome, my lord. Being reconciled to `
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the `
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Prince your brother, I owe you all duty. `
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John. I thank you. I am not of many words, but I thank you. `
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Leon. Please it your Grace lead on? `
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Pedro. Your hand, Leonato. We will go together. `
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Exeunt. Manent Benedick and Claudio. `
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Claud. Benedick, didst thou note the daughter of Signior `
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Leonato? `
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Bene. I noted her not, but I look'd on her. `
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Claud. Is she not a modest young lady? `
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Bene. Do you question me, as an honest man should do, for my `
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simple `
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true judgment? or would you have me speak after my custom, as `
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being a professed tyrant to their sex? `
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Claud. No. I pray thee speak in sober judgment. `
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Bene. Why, i' faith, methinks she's too low for a high praise, `
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too brown for a fair praise, and too little for a great `
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praise. `
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Only this commendation I can afford her, that were she other `
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than she is, she were unhandsome, and being no other but as `
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she `
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is, I do not like her. `
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Claud. Thou thinkest I am in sport. I pray thee tell me truly `
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how `
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thou lik'st her. `
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Bene. Would you buy her, that you enquire after her? `
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Claud. Can the world buy such a jewel? `
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Bene. Yea, and a case to put it into. But speak you this with a `
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sad `
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brow? or do you play the flouting Jack, to tell us Cupid is a `
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good hare-finder and Vulcan a rare carpenter? Come, in what `
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key `
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shall a man take you to go in the song? `
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Claud. In mine eye she is the sweetest lady that ever I look'd `
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on. `
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Bene. I can see yet without spectacles, and I see no such `
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matter. `
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There's her cousin, an she were not possess'd with a `
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fury,exceeds `
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her as much in beauty as the first of May doth the last of `
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December. But I hope you have no intent to turn husband, have `
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you? `
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Claud. I would scarce trust myself, though I had sworn the `
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contrary, if Hero would be my wife. `
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Bene. Is't come to this? In faith, hath not the world one man `
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but `
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he will wear his cap with suspicion? Shall I never see a `
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bachelor of threescore again? Go to, i' faith! An thou wilt `
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needs `
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thrust thy neck into a yoke, wear the print of it and sigh `
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away `
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Sundays. `
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`
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Enter Don Pedro. `
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`
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Look! Don Pedro is returned to seek you. `
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Pedro. What secret hath held you here, that you followed not to `
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Leonato's? `
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Bene. I would your Grace would constrain me to tell. `
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Pedro. I charge thee on thy allegiance. `
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Bene. You hear, Count Claudio. I can be secret as a dumb man, I `
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would have you think so; but, on my allegiance--mark you `
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this-on `
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my allegiance! he is in love. With who? Now that is your `
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Grace's `
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part. Mark how short his answer is: With Hero, Leonato's `
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short `
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daughter. `
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Claud. If this were so, so were it utt'red. `
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Bene. Like the old tale, my lord: 'It is not so, nor 'twas not `
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so; `
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but indeed, God forbid it should be so!' `
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Claud. If my passion change not shortly, God forbid it should `
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be `
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otherwise. `
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Pedro. Amen, if you love her; for the lady is very well worthy. `
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Claud. You speak this to fetch me in, my lord. `
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Pedro. By my troth, I speak my thought. `
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Claud. And, in faith, my lord, I spoke mine. `
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Bene. And, by my two faiths and troths, my lord, I spoke mine. `
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Claud. That I love her, I feel. `
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Pedro. That she is worthy, I know. `
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Bene. That I neither feel how she should be loved, nor know how `
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she `
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should be worthy, is the opinion that fire cannot melt out of `
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me. `
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I will die in it at the stake. `
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Pedro. Thou wast ever an obstinate heretic in the despite of `
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beauty. `
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Claud. And never could maintain his part but in the force of `
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his `
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will. `
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Bene. That a woman conceived me, I thank her; that she brought `
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me `
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up, I likewise give her most humble thanks; but that I will `
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have `
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a rechate winded in my forehead, or hang my bugle in an `
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invisible `
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baldrick, all women shall pardon me. Because I will not do `
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them `
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the wrong to mistrust any, I will do myself the right to `
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trust `
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none; and the fine is (for the which I may go the finer), I `
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will `
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live a bachelor. `
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Pedro. I shall see thee, ere I die, look pale with love. `
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Bene. With anger, with sickness, or with hunger, my lord; not `
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with `
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love. Prove that ever I lose more blood with love than I will `
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get `
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again with drinking, pick out mine eyes with a ballad-maker's `
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pen `
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and hang me up at the door of a brothel house for the sign of `
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blind Cupid. `
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Pedro. Well, if ever thou dost fall from this faith, thou wilt `
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prove a notable argument. `
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Bene. If I do, hang me in a bottle like a cat and shoot at me; `
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and `
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he that hits me, let him be clapp'd on the shoulder and `
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call'd `
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Adam. `
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Pedro. Well, as time shall try. `
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'In time the savage bull doth bear the yoke.' `
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Bene. The savage bull may; but if ever the sensible Benedick `
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bear `
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it, pluck off the bull's horns and set them in my forehead, `
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and `
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let me be vilely painted, and in such great letters as they `
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write `
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'Here is good horse to hire,' let them signify under my sign `
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'Here you may see Benedick the married man.' `
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Claud. If this should ever happen, thou wouldst be horn-mad. `
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Pedro. Nay, if Cupid have not spent all his quiver in Venice, `
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thou `
`
wilt quake for this shortly. `
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Bene. I look for an earthquake too then. `
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Pedro. Well, you will temporize with the hours. In the `
`
meantime, `
`
good Signior Benedick, repair to Leonato's, commend me to him `
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and `
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tell him I will not fail him at supper; for indeed he hath `
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made `
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great preparation. `
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Bene. I have almost matter enough in me for such an embassage; `
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and `
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so I commit you-- `
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Claud. To the tuition of God. From my house--if I had it-- `
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Pedro. The sixth of July. Your loving friend, Benedick. `
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Bene. Nay, mock not, mock not. The body of your discourse is `
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sometime guarded with fragments, and the guards are but `
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slightly `
`
basted on neither. Ere you flout old ends any further, `
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examine `
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your conscience. And so I leave you. Exit. `
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Claud. My liege, your Highness now may do me good. `
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Pedro. My love is thine to teach. Teach it but how, `
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And thou shalt see how apt it is to learn `
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Any hard lesson that may do thee good. `
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Claud. Hath Leonato any son, my lord? `
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Pedro. No child but Hero; she's his only heir. `
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Dost thou affect her, Claudio? `
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Claud.O my lord, `
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When you went onward on this ended action, `
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I look'd upon her with a soldier's eye, `
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That lik'd, but had a rougher task in hand `
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Than to drive liking to the name of love; `
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But now I am return'd and that war-thoughts `
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Have left their places vacant, in their rooms `
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Come thronging soft and delicate desires, `
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All prompting me how fair young Hero is, `
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Saying I lik'd her ere I went to wars. `
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Pedro. Thou wilt be like a lover presently `
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And tire the hearer with a book of words. `
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If thou dost love fair Hero, cherish it, `
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And I will break with her and with her father, `
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And thou shalt have her. Wast not to this end `
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That thou began'st to twist so fine a story? `
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Claud. How sweetly you do minister to love, `
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That know love's grief by his complexion! `
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But lest my liking might too sudden seem, `
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I would have salv'd it with a longer treatise. `
`
Pedro. What need the bridge much broader than the flood? `
`
The fairest grant is the necessity. `
`
Look, what will serve is fit. 'Tis once, thou lovest, `
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And I will fit thee with the remedy. `
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I know we shall have revelling to-night. `
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