Reading Help MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING
watchings. `
` Claud. And I, my lord. `
` Pedro. And you too, gentle Hero? `
` Hero. I will do any modest office, my lord, to help my cousin `
` to a `
` good husband. `
` Pedro. And Benedick is not the unhopefullest husband that I `
` know. `
` Thus far can I praise him: he is of a noble strain, of `
` approved `
` valour, and confirm'd honesty. I will teach you how to humour `
` your cousin, that she shall fall in love with Benedick; and `
` I, `
` [to Leonato and Claudio] with your two helps, will so `
` practise on `
` Benedick that, in despite of his quick wit and his queasy `
` stomach, he shall fall in love with Beatrice. If we can do `
` this, `
` Cupid is no longer an archer; his glory shall be ours, for we `
` are `
` the only love-gods. Go in with me, and I will tell you my `
` drift. `
` Exeunt. `
` `
` `
` `
` `
` Scene II. `
` A hall in Leonato's house. `
` `
` Enter [Don] John and Borachio. `
` `
` John. It is so. The Count Claudio shall marry the daughter of `
` Leonato. `
` Bora. Yea, my lord; but I can cross it. `
` John. Any bar, any cross, any impediment will be med'cinable to `
` me. `
` I am sick in displeasure to him, and whatsoever comes athwart `
` his `
` affection ranges evenly with mine. How canst thou cross this `
` marriage? `
` Bora. Not honestly, my lord, but so covertly that no dishonesty `
` shall appear in me. `
` John. Show me briefly how. `
` Bora. I think I told your lordship, a year since, how much I am `
` in `
` the favour of Margaret, the waiting gentlewoman to Hero. `
` John. I remember. `
` Bora. I can, at any unseasonable instant of the night, appoint `
` her `
` to look out at her lady's chamber window. `
` John. What life is in that to be the death of this marriage? `
` Bora. The poison of that lies in you to temper. Go you to the `
` Prince your brother; spare not to tell him that he hath `
` wronged `
` his honour in marrying the renowned Claudio (whose estimation `
` do `
` you mightily hold up) to a contaminated stale, such a one as `
` Hero. `
` John. What proof shall I make of that? `
` Bora. Proof enough to misuse the Prince, to vex Claudio, to `
` undo `
` Hero, and kill Leonato. Look you for any other issue? `
` John. Only to despite them I will endeavour anything. `
` Bora. Go then; find me a meet hour to draw Don Pedro and the `
` Count `
` Claudio alone; tell them that you know that Hero loves me; `
` intend `
` a kind of zeal both to the Prince and Claudio, as--in love of `
` your brother's honour, who hath made this match, and his `
` friend's `
` reputation, who is thus like to be cozen'd with the semblance `
` of `
` a maid--that you have discover'd thus. They will scarcely `
` believe `
` this without trial. Offer them instances; which shall bear no `
` less likelihood than to see me at her chamber window, hear me `
` call Margaret Hero, hear Margaret term me Claudio; and bring `
` them `
` to see this the very night before the intended wedding (for `
` in `
` the meantime I will so fashion the matter that Hero shall be `
` absent) and there shall appear such seeming truth of Hero's `
` disloyalty that jealousy shall be call'd assurance and all `
` the `
` preparation overthrown. `
` John. Grow this to what adverse issue it can, I will put it in `
` practice. Be cunning in the working this, and thy fee is a `
` thousand ducats. `
` Bora. Be you constant in the accusation, and my cunning shall `
` not `
` shame me. `
` John. I will presently go learn their day of marriage. `
` Exeunt. `
` `
` `
` `
` `
` Scene III. `
` Leonato's orchard. `
` `
` Enter Benedick alone. `
` `
` `
` Bene. Boy! `
` `
` [Enter Boy.] `
` `
` Boy. Signior? `
` Bene. In my chamber window lies a book. Bring it hither to me `
` in `
` the orchard. `
` Boy. I am here already, sir. `
` Bene. I know that, but I would have thee hence and here again. `
` (Exit Boy.) I do much wonder that one man, seeing how much `
` another man is a fool when he dedicates his behaviours to `
` love, `
` will, after he hath laugh'd at such shallow follies in `
` others, `
` become the argument of his own scorn by falling in love; and `
` such `
` a man is Claudio. I have known when there was no music with `
` him `
` but the drum and the fife; and now had he rather hear the `
` tabor `
` and the pipe. I have known when he would have walk'd ten mile `
` afoot to see a good armour; and now will he lie ten nights `
` awake `
` carving the fashion of a new doublet. He was wont to speak `
` plain `
` and to the purpose, like an honest man and a soldier; and now `
` is `
` he turn'd orthography; his words are a very fantastical `
` banquet-- `
` just so many strange dishes. May I be so converted and see `
` with `
` these eyes? I cannot tell; I think not. I will not be sworn `
` but `
` love may transform me to an oyster; but I'll take my oath on `
` it, `
` till he have made an oyster of me he shall never make me such `
` a `
` fool. One woman is fair, yet I am well; another is wise, yet `
` I am `
` well; another virtuous, yet I am well; but till all graces be `
` in `
` one woman, one woman shall not come in my grace. Rich she `
` shall `
` be, that's certain; wise, or I'll none; virtuous, or I'll `
` never `
` cheapen her; fair, or I'll never look on her; mild, or come `
` not `
` near me; noble, or not I for an angel; of good discourse, an `
` excellent musician, and her hair shall be of what colour it `
` please God. Ha, the Prince and Monsieur Love! I will hide me `
` in `
` the arbour. [Hides.] `
` `
` Enter Don Pedro, Leonato, Claudio. `
` Music [within]. `
` `
` Pedro. Come, shall we hear this music? `
` Claud. Yea, my good lord. How still the evening is, `
` As hush'd on purpose to grace harmony! `
` Pedro. See you where Benedick hath hid himself? `
` Claud. O, very well, my lord. The music ended, `
` We'll fit the kid-fox with a pennyworth. `
` `
` Enter Balthasar with Music. `
` `
` Pedro. Come, Balthasar, we'll hear that song again. `
` Balth. O, good my lord, tax not so bad a voice `
` To slander music any more than once. `
` Pedro. It is the witness still of excellency `
` To put a strange face on his own perfection. `
` I pray thee sing, and let me woo no more. `
` Balth. Because you talk of wooing, I will sing, `
` Since many a wooer doth commence his suit `
` To her he thinks not worthy, yet he wooes, `
` Yet will he swear he loves. `
` Pedro. Nay, pray thee come; `
` Or if thou wilt hold longer argument, `
` Do it in notes. `
` Balth. Note this before my notes: `
` There's not a note of mine that's worth the noting. `
` Pedro. Why, these are very crotchets that he speaks! `
` Note notes, forsooth, and nothing! [Music.] `
` Bene. [aside] Now divine air! Now is his soul ravish'd! Is it `
` not `
` strange that sheep's guts should hale souls out of men's `
` bodies? `
` Well, a horn for my money, when all's done. `
` [Balthasar sings.] `
` The Song. `
` `
` Sigh no more, ladies, sigh no more! `
` Men were deceivers ever, `
` One foot in sea, and one on shore; `
` To one thing constant never. `
` Then sigh not so, `
` But let them go, `
`
` Claud. And I, my lord. `
` Pedro. And you too, gentle Hero? `
` Hero. I will do any modest office, my lord, to help my cousin `
` to a `
` good husband. `
` Pedro. And Benedick is not the unhopefullest husband that I `
` know. `
` Thus far can I praise him: he is of a noble strain, of `
` approved `
` valour, and confirm'd honesty. I will teach you how to humour `
` your cousin, that she shall fall in love with Benedick; and `
` I, `
` [to Leonato and Claudio] with your two helps, will so `
` practise on `
` Benedick that, in despite of his quick wit and his queasy `
` stomach, he shall fall in love with Beatrice. If we can do `
` this, `
` Cupid is no longer an archer; his glory shall be ours, for we `
` are `
` the only love-gods. Go in with me, and I will tell you my `
` drift. `
` Exeunt. `
` `
` `
` `
` `
` Scene II. `
` A hall in Leonato's house. `
` `
` Enter [Don] John and Borachio. `
` `
` John. It is so. The Count Claudio shall marry the daughter of `
` Leonato. `
` Bora. Yea, my lord; but I can cross it. `
` John. Any bar, any cross, any impediment will be med'cinable to `
` me. `
` I am sick in displeasure to him, and whatsoever comes athwart `
` his `
` affection ranges evenly with mine. How canst thou cross this `
` marriage? `
` Bora. Not honestly, my lord, but so covertly that no dishonesty `
` shall appear in me. `
` John. Show me briefly how. `
` Bora. I think I told your lordship, a year since, how much I am `
` in `
` the favour of Margaret, the waiting gentlewoman to Hero. `
` John. I remember. `
` Bora. I can, at any unseasonable instant of the night, appoint `
` her `
` to look out at her lady's chamber window. `
` John. What life is in that to be the death of this marriage? `
` Bora. The poison of that lies in you to temper. Go you to the `
` Prince your brother; spare not to tell him that he hath `
` wronged `
` his honour in marrying the renowned Claudio (whose estimation `
` do `
` you mightily hold up) to a contaminated stale, such a one as `
` Hero. `
` John. What proof shall I make of that? `
` Bora. Proof enough to misuse the Prince, to vex Claudio, to `
` undo `
` Hero, and kill Leonato. Look you for any other issue? `
` John. Only to despite them I will endeavour anything. `
` Bora. Go then; find me a meet hour to draw Don Pedro and the `
` Count `
` Claudio alone; tell them that you know that Hero loves me; `
` intend `
` a kind of zeal both to the Prince and Claudio, as--in love of `
` your brother's honour, who hath made this match, and his `
` friend's `
` reputation, who is thus like to be cozen'd with the semblance `
` of `
` a maid--that you have discover'd thus. They will scarcely `
` believe `
` this without trial. Offer them instances; which shall bear no `
` less likelihood than to see me at her chamber window, hear me `
` call Margaret Hero, hear Margaret term me Claudio; and bring `
` them `
` to see this the very night before the intended wedding (for `
` in `
` the meantime I will so fashion the matter that Hero shall be `
` absent) and there shall appear such seeming truth of Hero's `
` disloyalty that jealousy shall be call'd assurance and all `
` the `
` preparation overthrown. `
` John. Grow this to what adverse issue it can, I will put it in `
` practice. Be cunning in the working this, and thy fee is a `
` thousand ducats. `
` Bora. Be you constant in the accusation, and my cunning shall `
` not `
` shame me. `
` John. I will presently go learn their day of marriage. `
` Exeunt. `
` `
` `
` `
` `
` Scene III. `
` Leonato's orchard. `
` `
` Enter Benedick alone. `
` `
` `
` Bene. Boy! `
` `
` [Enter Boy.] `
` `
` Boy. Signior? `
` Bene. In my chamber window lies a book. Bring it hither to me `
` in `
` the orchard. `
` Boy. I am here already, sir. `
` Bene. I know that, but I would have thee hence and here again. `
` (Exit Boy.) I do much wonder that one man, seeing how much `
` another man is a fool when he dedicates his behaviours to `
` love, `
` will, after he hath laugh'd at such shallow follies in `
` others, `
` become the argument of his own scorn by falling in love; and `
` such `
` a man is Claudio. I have known when there was no music with `
` him `
` but the drum and the fife; and now had he rather hear the `
` tabor `
` and the pipe. I have known when he would have walk'd ten mile `
` afoot to see a good armour; and now will he lie ten nights `
` awake `
` carving the fashion of a new doublet. He was wont to speak `
` plain `
` and to the purpose, like an honest man and a soldier; and now `
` is `
` he turn'd orthography; his words are a very fantastical `
` banquet-- `
` just so many strange dishes. May I be so converted and see `
` with `
` these eyes? I cannot tell; I think not. I will not be sworn `
` but `
` love may transform me to an oyster; but I'll take my oath on `
` it, `
` till he have made an oyster of me he shall never make me such `
` a `
` fool. One woman is fair, yet I am well; another is wise, yet `
` I am `
` well; another virtuous, yet I am well; but till all graces be `
` in `
` one woman, one woman shall not come in my grace. Rich she `
` shall `
` be, that's certain; wise, or I'll none; virtuous, or I'll `
` never `
` cheapen her; fair, or I'll never look on her; mild, or come `
` not `
` near me; noble, or not I for an angel; of good discourse, an `
` excellent musician, and her hair shall be of what colour it `
` please God. Ha, the Prince and Monsieur Love! I will hide me `
` in `
` the arbour. [Hides.] `
` `
` Enter Don Pedro, Leonato, Claudio. `
` Music [within]. `
` `
` Pedro. Come, shall we hear this music? `
` Claud. Yea, my good lord. How still the evening is, `
` As hush'd on purpose to grace harmony! `
` Pedro. See you where Benedick hath hid himself? `
` Claud. O, very well, my lord. The music ended, `
` We'll fit the kid-fox with a pennyworth. `
` `
` Enter Balthasar with Music. `
` `
` Pedro. Come, Balthasar, we'll hear that song again. `
` Balth. O, good my lord, tax not so bad a voice `
` To slander music any more than once. `
` Pedro. It is the witness still of excellency `
` To put a strange face on his own perfection. `
` I pray thee sing, and let me woo no more. `
` Balth. Because you talk of wooing, I will sing, `
` Since many a wooer doth commence his suit `
` To her he thinks not worthy, yet he wooes, `
` Yet will he swear he loves. `
` Pedro. Nay, pray thee come; `
` Or if thou wilt hold longer argument, `
` Do it in notes. `
` Balth. Note this before my notes: `
` There's not a note of mine that's worth the noting. `
` Pedro. Why, these are very crotchets that he speaks! `
` Note notes, forsooth, and nothing! [Music.] `
` Bene. [aside] Now divine air! Now is his soul ravish'd! Is it `
` not `
` strange that sheep's guts should hale souls out of men's `
` bodies? `
` Well, a horn for my money, when all's done. `
` [Balthasar sings.] `
` The Song. `
` `
` Sigh no more, ladies, sigh no more! `
` Men were deceivers ever, `
` One foot in sea, and one on shore; `
` To one thing constant never. `
` Then sigh not so, `
` But let them go, `
`