Reading Help Alice's adventure in wonderland
`And how do you know that you're mad?' `
` `
` `To begin with,' said the Cat, `a dog's not mad. You grant `
` that?' `
` `
` `I suppose so,' said Alice. `
` `
` `Well, then,' the Cat went on, `you see, a dog growls when it's `
` angry, and wags its tail when it's pleased. Now I growl when I'm `
` pleased, and wag my tail when I'm angry. Therefore I'm mad.' `
` `
` `I call it purring, not growling,' said Alice. `
` `
` `Call it what you like,' said the Cat. `Do you play croquet `
` with the Queen to-day?' `
` `
` `I should like it very much,' said Alice, `but I haven't been `
` invited yet.' `
` `
` `You'll see me there,' said the Cat, and vanished. `
` `
` Alice was not much surprised at this, she was getting so used `
` to queer things happening. While she was looking at the place `
` where it had been, it suddenly appeared again. `
` `
` `By-the-bye, what became of the baby?' said the Cat. `I'd `
` nearly forgotten to ask.' `
` `
` `It turned into a pig,' Alice quietly said, just as if it had `
` come back in a natural way. `
` `
` `I thought it would,' said the Cat, and vanished again. `
` `
` Alice waited a little, half expecting to see it again, but it `
` did not appear, and after a minute or two she walked on in the `
` direction in which the March Hare was said to live. `I've seen `
` hatters before,' she said to herself; `the March Hare will be `
` much the most interesting, and perhaps as this is May it won't be `
` raving mad--at least not so mad as it was in March.' As she said `
` this, she looked up, and there was the Cat again, sitting on a `
` branch of a tree. `
` `
` `Did you say pig, or fig?' said the Cat. `
` `
` `I said pig,' replied Alice; `and I wish you wouldn't keep `
` appearing and vanishing so suddenly: you make one quite giddy.' `
` `
` `All right,' said the Cat; and this time it vanished quite slowly, `
` beginning with the end of the tail, and ending with the grin, `
` which remained some time after the rest of it had gone. `
` `
` `Well! I've often seen a cat without a grin,' thought Alice; `
` `but a grin without a cat! It's the most curious thing I ever `
` saw in my life!' `
` `
` She had not gone much farther before she came in sight of the `
` house of the March Hare: she thought it must be the right house, `
` because the chimneys were shaped like ears and the roof was `
` thatched with fur. It was so large a house, that she did not `
` like to go nearer till she had nibbled some more of the lefthand `
` bit of mushroom, and raised herself to about two feet high: even `
` then she walked up towards it rather timidly, saying to herself `
` `Suppose it should be raving mad after all! I almost wish I'd `
` gone to see the Hatter instead!' `
` `
` `
` `
` CHAPTER VII `
` `
` A Mad Tea-Party `
` `
` `
` There was a table set out under a tree in front of the house, `
` and the March Hare and the Hatter were having tea at it: a `
` Dormouse was sitting between them, fast asleep, and the other two `
` were using it as a cushion, resting their elbows on it, and talking `
` over its head. `Very uncomfortable for the Dormouse,' thought Alice; `
` `only, as it's asleep, I suppose it doesn't mind.' `
` `
` The table was a large one, but the three were all crowded `
` together at one corner of it: `No room! No room!' they cried `
` out when they saw Alice coming. `There's PLENTY of room!' said `
` Alice indignantly, and she sat down in a large arm-chair at one `
` end of the table. `
` `
` `Have some wine,' the March Hare said in an encouraging tone. `
` `
` Alice looked all round the table, but there was nothing on it `
` but tea. `I don't see any wine,' she remarked. `
` `
` `There isn't any,' said the March Hare. `
` `
` `Then it wasn't very civil of you to offer it,' said Alice `
` angrily. `
` `
` `It wasn't very civil of you to sit down without being `
` invited,' said the March Hare. `
` `
` `I didn't know it was YOUR table,' said Alice; `it's laid for a `
` great many more than three.' `
` `
` `Your hair wants cutting,' said the Hatter. He had been `
` looking at Alice for some time with great curiosity, and this was `
` his first speech. `
` `
` `You should learn not to make personal remarks,' Alice said `
` with some severity; `it's very rude.' `
` `
` The Hatter opened his eyes very wide on hearing this; but all `
` he SAID was, `Why is a raven like a writing-desk?' `
` `
` `Come, we shall have some fun now!' thought Alice. `I'm glad `
` they've begun asking riddles.--I believe I can guess that,' she `
` added aloud. `
` `
` `Do you mean that you think you can find out the answer to it?' `
` said the March Hare. `
` `
` `Exactly so,' said Alice. `
` `
` `Then you should say what you mean,' the March Hare went on. `
` `
` `I do,' Alice hastily replied; `at least--at least I mean what `
` I say--that's the same thing, you know.' `
` `
` `Not the same thing a bit!' said the Hatter. `You might just `
` as well say that "I see what I eat" is the same thing as "I eat `
` what I see"!' `
` `
` `You might just as well say,' added the March Hare, `that "I `
` like what I get" is the same thing as "I get what I like"!' `
` `
` `You might just as well say,' added the Dormouse, who seemed to `
` be talking in his sleep, `that "I breathe when I sleep" is the `
` same thing as "I sleep when I breathe"!' `
` `
` `It IS the same thing with you,' said the Hatter, and here the `
` conversation dropped, and the party sat silent for a minute, `
` while Alice thought over all she could remember about ravens and `
` writing-desks, which wasn't much. `
` `
` The Hatter was the first to break the silence. `What day of `
` the month is it?' he said, turning to Alice: he had taken his `
` watch out of his pocket, and was looking at it uneasily, shaking `
` it every now and then, and holding it to his ear. `
` `
` Alice considered a little, and then said `The fourth.' `
` `
` `Two days wrong!' sighed the Hatter. `I told you butter `
` wouldn't suit the works!' he added looking angrily at the March `
` Hare. `
` `
` `It was the BEST butter,' the March Hare meekly replied. `
` `
` `Yes, but some crumbs must have got in as well,' the Hatter `
` grumbled: `you shouldn't have put it in with the bread-knife.' `
` `
` The March Hare took the watch and looked at it gloomily: then `
` he dipped it into his cup of tea, and looked at it again: but he `
` could think of nothing better to say than his first remark, `It `
` was the BEST butter, you know.' `
` `
` Alice had been looking over his shoulder with some curiosity. `
` `What a funny watch!' she remarked. `It tells the day of the `
` month, and doesn't tell what o'clock it is!' `
` `
` `Why should it?' muttered the Hatter. `Does YOUR watch tell `
` you what year it is?' `
` `
` `Of course not,' Alice replied very readily: `but that's `
` because it stays the same year for such a long time together.' `
` `
` `Which is just the case with MINE,' said the Hatter. `
` `
` Alice felt dreadfully puzzled. The Hatter's remark seemed to `
` have no sort of meaning in it, and yet it was certainly English. `
` `I don't quite understand you,' she said, as politely as she `
` could. `
` `
` `The Dormouse is asleep again,' said the Hatter, and he poured `
` a little hot tea upon its nose. `
` `
` The Dormouse shook its head impatiently, and said, without `
` opening its eyes, `Of course, of course; just what I was going to `
` remark myself.' `
` `
` `Have you guessed the riddle yet?' the Hatter said, turning to `
` Alice again. `
` `
` `No, I give it up,' Alice replied: `what's the answer?' `
` `
` `I haven't the slightest idea,' said the Hatter. `
` `
` `Nor I,' said the March Hare. `
` `
` Alice sighed wearily. `I think you might do something better `
` with the time,' she said, `than waste it in asking riddles that `
` have no answers.' `
` `
` `If you knew Time as well as I do,' said the Hatter, `you `
` wouldn't talk about wasting IT. It's HIM.' `
`
` `
` `To begin with,' said the Cat, `a dog's not mad. You grant `
` that?' `
` `
` `I suppose so,' said Alice. `
` `
` `Well, then,' the Cat went on, `you see, a dog growls when it's `
` angry, and wags its tail when it's pleased. Now I growl when I'm `
` pleased, and wag my tail when I'm angry. Therefore I'm mad.' `
` `
` `I call it purring, not growling,' said Alice. `
` `
` `Call it what you like,' said the Cat. `Do you play croquet `
` with the Queen to-day?' `
` `
` `I should like it very much,' said Alice, `but I haven't been `
` invited yet.' `
` `
` `You'll see me there,' said the Cat, and vanished. `
` `
` Alice was not much surprised at this, she was getting so used `
` to queer things happening. While she was looking at the place `
` where it had been, it suddenly appeared again. `
` `
` `By-the-bye, what became of the baby?' said the Cat. `I'd `
` nearly forgotten to ask.' `
` `
` `It turned into a pig,' Alice quietly said, just as if it had `
` come back in a natural way. `
` `
` `I thought it would,' said the Cat, and vanished again. `
` `
` Alice waited a little, half expecting to see it again, but it `
` did not appear, and after a minute or two she walked on in the `
` direction in which the March Hare was said to live. `I've seen `
` hatters before,' she said to herself; `the March Hare will be `
` much the most interesting, and perhaps as this is May it won't be `
` raving mad--at least not so mad as it was in March.' As she said `
` this, she looked up, and there was the Cat again, sitting on a `
` branch of a tree. `
` `
` `Did you say pig, or fig?' said the Cat. `
` `
` `I said pig,' replied Alice; `and I wish you wouldn't keep `
` appearing and vanishing so suddenly: you make one quite giddy.' `
` `
` `All right,' said the Cat; and this time it vanished quite slowly, `
` beginning with the end of the tail, and ending with the grin, `
` which remained some time after the rest of it had gone. `
` `
` `Well! I've often seen a cat without a grin,' thought Alice; `
` `but a grin without a cat! It's the most curious thing I ever `
` saw in my life!' `
` `
` She had not gone much farther before she came in sight of the `
` house of the March Hare: she thought it must be the right house, `
` because the chimneys were shaped like ears and the roof was `
` thatched with fur. It was so large a house, that she did not `
` like to go nearer till she had nibbled some more of the lefthand `
` bit of mushroom, and raised herself to about two feet high: even `
` then she walked up towards it rather timidly, saying to herself `
` `Suppose it should be raving mad after all! I almost wish I'd `
` gone to see the Hatter instead!' `
` `
` `
` `
` CHAPTER VII `
` `
` A Mad Tea-Party `
` `
` `
` There was a table set out under a tree in front of the house, `
` and the March Hare and the Hatter were having tea at it: a `
` Dormouse was sitting between them, fast asleep, and the other two `
` were using it as a cushion, resting their elbows on it, and talking `
` over its head. `Very uncomfortable for the Dormouse,' thought Alice; `
` `only, as it's asleep, I suppose it doesn't mind.' `
` `
` The table was a large one, but the three were all crowded `
` together at one corner of it: `No room! No room!' they cried `
` out when they saw Alice coming. `There's PLENTY of room!' said `
` Alice indignantly, and she sat down in a large arm-chair at one `
` end of the table. `
` `
` `Have some wine,' the March Hare said in an encouraging tone. `
` `
` Alice looked all round the table, but there was nothing on it `
` but tea. `I don't see any wine,' she remarked. `
` `
` `There isn't any,' said the March Hare. `
` `
` `Then it wasn't very civil of you to offer it,' said Alice `
` angrily. `
` `
` `It wasn't very civil of you to sit down without being `
` invited,' said the March Hare. `
` `
` `I didn't know it was YOUR table,' said Alice; `it's laid for a `
` great many more than three.' `
` `
` `Your hair wants cutting,' said the Hatter. He had been `
` looking at Alice for some time with great curiosity, and this was `
` his first speech. `
` `
` `You should learn not to make personal remarks,' Alice said `
` with some severity; `it's very rude.' `
` `
` The Hatter opened his eyes very wide on hearing this; but all `
` he SAID was, `Why is a raven like a writing-desk?' `
` `
` `Come, we shall have some fun now!' thought Alice. `I'm glad `
` they've begun asking riddles.--I believe I can guess that,' she `
` added aloud. `
` `
` `Do you mean that you think you can find out the answer to it?' `
` said the March Hare. `
` `
` `Exactly so,' said Alice. `
` `
` `Then you should say what you mean,' the March Hare went on. `
` `
` `I do,' Alice hastily replied; `at least--at least I mean what `
` I say--that's the same thing, you know.' `
` `
` `Not the same thing a bit!' said the Hatter. `You might just `
` as well say that "I see what I eat" is the same thing as "I eat `
` what I see"!' `
` `
` `You might just as well say,' added the March Hare, `that "I `
` like what I get" is the same thing as "I get what I like"!' `
` `
` `You might just as well say,' added the Dormouse, who seemed to `
` be talking in his sleep, `that "I breathe when I sleep" is the `
` same thing as "I sleep when I breathe"!' `
` `
` `It IS the same thing with you,' said the Hatter, and here the `
` conversation dropped, and the party sat silent for a minute, `
` while Alice thought over all she could remember about ravens and `
` writing-desks, which wasn't much. `
` `
` The Hatter was the first to break the silence. `What day of `
` the month is it?' he said, turning to Alice: he had taken his `
` watch out of his pocket, and was looking at it uneasily, shaking `
` it every now and then, and holding it to his ear. `
` `
` Alice considered a little, and then said `The fourth.' `
` `
` `Two days wrong!' sighed the Hatter. `I told you butter `
` wouldn't suit the works!' he added looking angrily at the March `
` Hare. `
` `
` `It was the BEST butter,' the March Hare meekly replied. `
` `
` `Yes, but some crumbs must have got in as well,' the Hatter `
` grumbled: `you shouldn't have put it in with the bread-knife.' `
` `
` The March Hare took the watch and looked at it gloomily: then `
` he dipped it into his cup of tea, and looked at it again: but he `
` could think of nothing better to say than his first remark, `It `
` was the BEST butter, you know.' `
` `
` Alice had been looking over his shoulder with some curiosity. `
` `What a funny watch!' she remarked. `It tells the day of the `
` month, and doesn't tell what o'clock it is!' `
` `
` `Why should it?' muttered the Hatter. `Does YOUR watch tell `
` you what year it is?' `
` `
` `Of course not,' Alice replied very readily: `but that's `
` because it stays the same year for such a long time together.' `
` `
` `Which is just the case with MINE,' said the Hatter. `
` `
` Alice felt dreadfully puzzled. The Hatter's remark seemed to `
` have no sort of meaning in it, and yet it was certainly English. `
` `I don't quite understand you,' she said, as politely as she `
` could. `
` `
` `The Dormouse is asleep again,' said the Hatter, and he poured `
` a little hot tea upon its nose. `
` `
` The Dormouse shook its head impatiently, and said, without `
` opening its eyes, `Of course, of course; just what I was going to `
` remark myself.' `
` `
` `Have you guessed the riddle yet?' the Hatter said, turning to `
` Alice again. `
` `
` `No, I give it up,' Alice replied: `what's the answer?' `
` `
` `I haven't the slightest idea,' said the Hatter. `
` `
` `Nor I,' said the March Hare. `
` `
` Alice sighed wearily. `I think you might do something better `
` with the time,' she said, `than waste it in asking riddles that `
` have no answers.' `
` `
` `If you knew Time as well as I do,' said the Hatter, `you `
` wouldn't talk about wasting IT. It's HIM.' `
`